Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Whitey is Pissed

I had been formulating a post regarding this little nugget of truth for a bit now, but was unsure as to the focus and direction it was going to take until soon to be former Mayor Ray Nagin decided to shoot himself and New Orleans in the kneecap yesterday by decreeing that God is angry with America and that God's will is for New Orleans to remain a Chocolate City.

While stealing the idea from Parliament as to a Chocolate City, Nagin tried his worst to correct the media's misunderstanding of his usage of Chocolate City by stating that Chocolate is actually a mix of dark chocolate and vanilla. Sorry Ray Ray - nobody's letting you get off with that one - especially not your average Vanilla Neighborhood constituent.

What's interesting about this is that when Ray Ray first appeared on the political scene and came out of nowhere to win his position as Mayor, he was the secret Vanilla Candidate in the Chocolate City. You see, his mother is white and the running joke amongst Whitey was that he was going to be the last white mayor the city of New Orleans was ever going to have.

But unfortunately, Ray Ray's internal polling must have shown to him that the only way he can be re-elected as Mayor is to fire up his chocolate constituents who are spread now all over the entire country with insane racial Jihad rhetoric.

And this city has been on the verge of combusting for some time now.

Vanilla has been furious at the way Chocolate made all New Orleanians look in the wake of Katrina. Vanilla has been afterglowing in a city that is now Vanilla City with a hint of Fudge, as there is next to ZERO crime. Vanilla is pissed that Vanilla has been back here for months rebuilding this city, yet all they see from the media is Chocolate screaming from Houston and Atlanta.

Now look, everything is never so Chocolate and Vanilla, but everyone's nerves are near the breaking point in this city - C. Ray is grasping for re-election, but by trying to save his job by bringing down the entire city is a criminal act.

Bye bye Ray Ray. You're done.

Then they blew up the levee, wait strike that...

Then they blew up New Orleans.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

damn funny.
C Ray lost my vote.

- Vanilla Bean, voting in NOLA

3:38 PM, January 17, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love you!! When I fly back home from my exile in California and When I go visit my sister's yet to permitted house on Colbert I will shout loudly from her denuded mudflat of a front yard that you are her best neighbor ever! Keep it up!

7:39 PM, January 17, 2006  

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